Body Language

Body Language

Body LanguageBody language says it all…almost.

Experts say that if you took 100 % of the communication we receive:

7 % of communication is ‘received’ by words

38 % of communication is ‘received’ by sounds

55 % communication is ‘received’ by body language

That is huge!! How are people reading you? It makes me want to stop and consider what body language I am using as I interact with my children,  and for that matter my husband. Could I be giving signals I didn’t intend? To be an engaged parent it takes A LOT of listening.

Do you ever catch yourself doing the blank stare after a 15 minute monologue from one of the children about something they love, which you may not (like Pokémon or superheroes)? I think I will try to do a little more POSITIVE body language these days. Notice those around you. We are all quite masterful at our body language communication.Body Language

 

Short Story – Conclusion

A goof off picture of Ron and I.

Well, here is the amateur’s short story conclusion…

Short Story – Conclusion

Choice (continued)

by Julie Valentine

The guy down there was a jerk, no one would miss him. Images of the tour groups accusing faces assaulted him. Would they believe this was an accident? Groping around, he found his handkerchief and mopped his face.

Rand leaned over the guardrail again in an attempt to spot Clifford. There was still no sign of him. “Hey, you ok down there?” he croaked.  Clifford was probably fine. Brooke would be grateful he found her license. His skin pricked at the possibility of Clifford being hurt, but his hesitation was short lived. He would let Clifford find his own way back to the group.  He turned, loping up the trail through more mud, black, and oozing under his feet. A limb smacked him in the face as he hurried along, leaving a red welt under his right eye. Adrenaline pumped him on.

Turmoil roiled within Rand, thoughts swam around in his head as he tried to decide if the guilt inside was worth the affections of anyone? He hadn’t meant to hurt the jerk. Maybe he was fine down there. Reaching the group, he glanced at Brooke as he approached, measuring her reaction to the found license. The close proximity to her sent a wave of pleasure over him, faint drifts of fragrance wafting from her body reaching his senses. Brooke seemed so happy to get that license back. It was enough to help him temporarily forget the past few minutes. “Mind if I walk with you gals?” Rand ventured.

Brooke felt so relieved that Rand had found her license. The headache she would surely avoid was a huge help as she looked over at Rand. That really was a sweet thing he did for her. She considered him for a minute thinking, “I really ought to be nice to him for running back for me.” She smiled and thanked Rand. A grin erupted on his face causing Brooke to hesitate in her praise of him. She began to question Rand about himself in an attempt to be friendly when the tour guide’s radio interrupted the jungle sounds.

Not paying much attention to their guide’s crackling radio, Brooke asked Rand what was taking her brother so long to get back to the group. Heat rose to his face as he turned to her and sputtered, “Your brother?!”

“Yeah, my brother that ran after you for the license. He bugs me so much sometimes with how protective he is, but it’s nice to have someone look after me too.”

Rand stumbled backwards, his breath coming in short bursts like the panting of a dog. Brooke instinctively tried to grab him. Both of them looked over at the guide who was trying to get everyone’s attention by waving them over to him. He motioned for the group to congregate and after doing so announced that the tour had been suspended because the authorities received a distress call from the phone of a hiker that had fallen. Help had not arrived in time. The body found would need to be recovered and carried out. Chaos erupted in the group as the tour guide tried to gain control.

Rand’s world came crashing down around him. The acrid taste of bile rose in his throat as the events of the past few minutes crashed about his head. He took a fleeting glance at Brooke’s face and saw disdain and suspicion. She stood behind Sierra slightly trembling, and clinging to her arm. His own face reflected the responsibility of a mind riddled with the remorse of the guilty.  Despair folded its way through him; he’d made the wrong choice.

The End

Short Story – Part 3

 

The whole wonderful crazy gang..

Remember, I am soooo amateur!

Short Story – Part 3­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­

Choice (continued)

by Julie Valentine

He decided that now was as good of a time as any to get to work on the girls. He had a twinge of hesitation as he thought of his ex-wife. Whatever the ordeal was in his ex-wife’s mind he just couldn’t figure out. Jen didn’t realize what she’d given up when she’d kicked him out.

A few feet from the girls, Rand’s sweating increased. He silently cursed the humidity and heat even though he knew the sweat was partially due to the nerves that suddenly came to life within him. Rand chastised himself for having doubts about his appeal. He was in control here; he hadn’t gone downhill that much since his days of glory. As he studied the girls, he noticed them exchanging a look with each other. Ok, what was that supposed to mean? Were they both interested or what? He swiped a hand across his forehead and watched as one of the girl’s eyes followed his hand. That’s the one I’d like to get to know, he thought. He’d had a hard time most of his life resisting getting involved with blond curvy gals.

Shadows fell across the group as they neared a heavy cluster of tall trees overhead. Tour members were stopping for a break. As he stepped up to the girls trying to formulate a good opening remark, Rand noticed a thought come over Brooke. She proclaimed to the group that she had lost her driver’s license out of her pocket.  Her face crumpled as she grabbed her hair saying, “This can’t be happening!”

The lost license was a perfect way for Rand to gain favor with Brooke. His eyes grazed her form as he said he’d be happy to walk back and see if he could find it. Turning, he shifted his bulk back down the trail. He hadn’t gone 50 yards when Clifford, whose shoes were sucking from the formation of mud clumps, plodded past him on the way down the trail growling, “Save your energy, I’ve got this covered.”

Rand swore under his breath and shoved past him again, nearly knocking the guy’s slight frame over. “Get lost,” Rand spit at Clifford. The two began racing down the slope out of sight of the group. Near a fork in the trail, there was a drop off where crags glistened with trickling water. Dark shadows loomed around the trail causing a brief chill. In order to pass, travelers needed to hang onto a guardrail. Heart pumping, chest heaving, and unable to speak, Rand glared at the man next to him. Rand spotted the license seconds before Clifford. The two scuffled to reach the license on the other side of the rail. The slick rocks had collected moisture on the narrow trail. Rand panted as he threw his muscled leg over the rail in an attempt to pluck up the paper. Clifford was right beside him. At the moment Rand’s leg swung around, his supporting foot slid, kicking Clifford with his other foot, sending him screaming down the ravine. There was a sickening thud as he hit something on the way down.  Shocked, Rand froze. A prickle of fear jetted up his spine. He took a quick glance down. Seeing nothing, he wavered between running to get help and pretending to know nothing. The guy down there was a jerk, no one would miss him. Images of the tour groups accusing faces assaulted him. Would they believe this was an accident? Groping around, he found his handkerchief and mopped his face.

Short Story – Part 2

 Another picture of one of my gals and her hubby…

Short Story – Part 2­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­

Choice (continued)

by Julie Valentine

Brooke leaned into Sierra and spoke softly, “That fur on his legs makes me want to gag. Plus, the guy is still living in the eighties, look at that head of big hair.”

“Careful Brooke, he’s going to think you’re checking him out.” Sierra said.

Brooke still stared at his legs, “He should shave those legs, stuff could get lost in there.”

“If you don’t stop gawking, he is totally going to get the wrong idea,” warned Sierra.

Brooke gave a small yelp, “Ack, he’s coming our way, quick what do I do?”

Rand had detected Brooke staring at him as they trudged through the thick foliage. He couldn’t blame her. He had kept himself looking good all these years. The added weight to his middle was easy to overlook when you took in the whole package, he thought.  He knew women had a hard time not noticing him and that annoyed the men. That must be why Clifford was being such a pesky gnat around the girls.

Brooke was horrified as she watched the arrogant Rand pluck a crimson flower and lumber towards her. He was trying to hold her eye contact and she was starting to panic. “Sierra, help!” she urgently whispered. “Hey, you shouldn’t have been studying those furry legs so long, he thinks you’re interested.” Sierra whispered back.  Brooke’s eyes widened as she watched Rand elbow Clifford out of his way.

Clifford frowned when Rand shoved past him to get to Brooke. The guy has too much confidence in himself, Clifford thought. He was even considering how he might take Rand’s ego down a couple of notches. He started to mull over ways to humiliate the arrogant chump in front of the women.

Rand didn’t care much about the other guys in the group; his focus was on the females, particularly Brooke. Although, he was momentarily annoyed by the sour smell of body odor emanating off of Clifford as he passed him. He would have to work himself into a photo with the two gals and brag to his buddies back home.

As he approached Brooke with the flower she took an almost imperceptible step backwards. It wasn’t lost on Rand and his grin faltered. Rand’s eyes flicked between the two girls assessing their reaction to his attention. He would not lose his nerve. He knew he had what it took to attract the ladies. High School had proven that time and again. The females couldn’t stay away from him back then. The memories brought a faint smile to his thick lips. He never lacked girls asking him out or showering him with attention. These two gals would be no different. He decided that now was as good of a time as any to get to work on the girls. He had a twinge of hesitation as he thought of his ex-wife. Whatever the ordeal was in his ex-wife’s mind he just couldn’t figure out. Jen didn’t realize what she’d given up when she’d kicked him out.

(I have hesitated putting this story on my website…I’ve decided at the age of 55, I need to finish college. So, rather than attending classes all day away from my family, I have decided to earn my degree online. This may very likely take me 8 years. Deciding what to have my emphasis in, was tricky.  I stink at writing….but I want to get good. That is the emphasis I chose. Very scary. It is a struggle to eek out the writing assignments my professors request but very rewarding at the same time. I have decided to share my first attempt at writing, here. Be kind in your critiquing! It is very amateur, but after receiving a high score on this particular piece and the professor asking if I was going to publish it, I decided to take the plunge and expose my attempt at writing. Ya have to start somewhere right?  I will post the short story in segments.)
 

Roses and Snow Caves

Snow Cave

Roses and Snow Caves

Snow Cave

What a busy world we live in. Do you ever feel like you are caught up in such a whirlwind that you can hardly think straight? I am raising my hand here, high and long. We tend to be so task oriented. Where is the time to stop and smell those roses? There is so much joy in slowing down once in a while. Children have an amazing ability to smell those roses. We can learn a thing or two from them. That being said there seems to be time for the electronics…Often when we use the electronics to babysit the kids they lose a bit of their creative play and I have noticed that when I enforce ‘no screen’ time their imaginations turn on. One very snowy day the children spent most of the day outside building a snow cave…and snow tunnels…and snow benches! Their faces were alight with happiness. I even got to experience being in the cave and taking a photo from the inside out.

Christmas Giving

Christmas Giving

Christmas Giving

 

Christmas Giving

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

There is such magic in the air at Christmas time. There seems to be something tangible in the atmosphere. The world itself almost has a cozy feeling. The lights, music, giving…We want to give to each other. I think it is more than tradition. There is something within us that pricks us to want to give to others. Could it be that our hearts are turned to the Savior as the celebration of his birth nears?

Earlier Years, Fat Pants

fat pants

 

 

 

Earlier Years, Fat Pants

fat pantsI’ve been thinking about the years when my children were younger and longing a bit for those little bitty ones that made me laugh and cry! Baby Luke was really quiet for one of his naps. When I opened up the door, he had stuffed all of his pants with clothes and called them fat pants. He brought them into the living room and lined them up. I have no idea where he came up with that…ha! It’s interesting how we tend to long for what has passed or what is yet to come. Somewhere along the way we need to convince ourselves that now is pretty great too.

How do you use your time?

What direction are you going?

What direction are you going?How do you use your time? What direction are you going?

 

Consider the statement,  “Be effective as opposed to efficient.”

 

Neil A. Maxwell said, “The scriptural advice, “Do not run faster or labor more than you have strength” (D&C 10:4) suggests paced progress, much as God used seven creative periods in preparing man and this earth. There is a difference, therefore, between being “anxiously engaged” and being over-anxious and thus underengaged.

What direction are you going?

Some of us who would not chastise a neighbor for his frailties have a field day with our own. Some of us stand before no more harsh a judge than ourselves, a judge who stubbornly refuses to admit much happy evidence and who cares nothing for due process. Fortunately, the Lord loves us more than we love ourselves.. A constructive critic truly cares for that which he criticizes, including himself, whereas self-pity is the most condescending form of pity; it soon cannibalizes all other concerns.

Brothers and sisters, the scriptures are like a developmental display window through which we can see gradual growth—along with this vital lesson: it is direction first, then velocity! Enoch’s unique people were improved “in process of time.” (Moses 7:21.) Jesus “received not of the fullness at first, but received grace for grace” (D&C 93:12) and even He grew and “increased in wisdom and stature” (Luke 2:52).

Mom Moments

Mom Moments

Mom MomentsIt was just yesterday that I was a young mom, struggling with the diapers, nighttime wake-up calls, spit up on my blouse, cranky kids, and potty training. No really, it was just yesterday. I know it was literally years ago for most of my kids (I do still have fairly young ones), but my mind tells me it was yesterday. This allotment of time we have been given, isn’t always cherished.  I mean, come on, cherish messy diapers? Believe it or not, I’ll take the dirty diapers, to have those babies. There is nothing in the world like holding a new-born baby…

MOM MOMENTS!

So, hang on through the rough stuff and love and cherish the time you have with your little ones.  Big ones too.  They go before you know it. I happen to be in about every stage of life there is. Mom, grandma, little kids, big kids, middle kids, son-in-laws, grand kids, daughter-in-laws.  I guess what I am trying to say is, stop and think about what you are spending your time on. Is it really worth it? You can’t re-live those minutes or hours. My 9-year-old will NEVER EVER be 9 again.Mom Moments

Pass it forward

Pass it forward

Pass it forwardPass it forward

We have one life.  There is no way around that fact.  That said, how are you going to spend this limited gift?  Have you stopped to think about how wrapped up we get in our little sphere of life? I want you to try something.  Just try it. You will be amazed at how you feel afterwards.  Do something unexpectedly nice for someone.  This could be anyone.    The other day I noticed a woman in a dressing room in a discount store juggling clothing to try on with little ones in tow.  She noticed another woman bringing in a top and mentioned to her that she loved the top and asked where it was located in the store.  The woman that had the shirt, promptly went out and found 3 sizes of the mentioned shirt for the mother to try on, handing them to her over the door.  The woman with the children was astonished and thanked her profusely. It really warmed my heart to see the exchange between the two women. You’ve heard of the infamous ‘pass it forward’.  Has it happened to you? Try something! Step outside your comfort zone and show kindness to another.

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