NOTE: My son wrote this for an english project and im posting at his request.

 According to a recent poll, support for Gay Marriage has reached an all-time high. 59% of Americans now support it compared to a 30% approval that was reported in 2004 (US support). It is incredible how much public opinion has changed on this topic in a mere 11 years! The Argument addressing the pros and cons of gay marriage is about as complicated as it gets. There are many facets to the debate but I will only attempt to address one here. What is the effect of gay marriage on children? There are few things that are more important to society than the health and safety of the rising generation, and so the question must be asked, is it possible that same-sex parenting harms children? As the son of two wonderful parents and as a member of an incredibly supportive and loving family it is important to me, and I’m sure it is important to you, that all children have every opportunity to be raised in the best possible environment.




Because legalizing same-sex marriage is such a recent development (the world’s first legal gay marriage ceremony took place only 14 years ago) It has been difficult for researchers to gather sufficient data to gauge the effect that same-sex parenting has on children. Some of the studies that have been conducted are contradictory. Let’s take for our first example an article endorsed by the AAP. Between 1986 and 1992, 154 prospective lesbian mothers volunteered for a study that was designed to follow planned lesbian families from the children’s conception until they reached adulthood. Data was then gathered using surveys and interviews with the mothers. Using the data the study then asserted that teenage children of lesbian mothers were rated higher in social, academic and total competence than their counterparts taken from Achenbach’s normative sample of American youth (Gartrell and Bos).


In contrast a more recent study, published on Feb 27, 2015 by Donald Sullins, asserts the opposite. For this study results from 207,007 children (512 with same-sex parents) were taken from the U.S. National Health Interview Survey in which emotional and developmental problems were gauged with study controls regarding age, sex, race, and parent income and education. The evaluation found that children of same-sex parents were over two times as likely to suffer from emotional problems and that “Joint biological parents are associated with the lowest rate of child emotional problems by a factor of 4 relative to same-sex parents.”




If you search this topic on the internet you will find literature for and against same-sex parenting with similar contradictory results. What are we to make of this? Well first of all, not all studies are created equal. There are many nuances in the way that a study is designed that can create bias. The scientific method requires a blind, unbiased sampling of random participants in order to produce legitimate results. You will notice that in the first study mentioned 154 lesbian mothers volunteered for the study. Is it fair to compare the parenting results of 154 eager volunteers to the remainder of the entire American population? An additional bias was created in this study by allowing the mothers of these children to transmit the data to the researchers. A proper study, such as the second one mentioned, would have no selection bias and would gather data from the children themselves not from the parents. This example unfortunately illustrates a major current trend in which researchers bias results in regards to such emotionally and politically charged debates such as this.


Loren Marks of Louisiana State University has written much on this problem. According to him, and common sense, only a study conducted with a large random sampling of children from same-sex parents and a large random sampling of children from opposite-sex parents will be able to adequately model the differences between the two groups. If you limit your research to these studies you will find that same-sex parenting doesn’t measure up. It turns out that you can’t fight biology. Kids need female mothers and male fathers.


Some additional statistics from a separate study conducted by Mark Regnerus further illustrate this. His study, which is backed by the NFSS, took special care to avoid selection bias which has been so prevalent in earlier studies. According to his study adult children of same-sex parents were 38% less likely to describe their family of origin as being secure. These children were also over 3 times as likely to have been forced to have sex against their will and were over 10 times more likely to have been sexually touched by an adult.



Much of the increased risk for these children is likely due to the political pressure that surrounds our culture in connection with this topic. Is it ethical to use children as political statements?

Source: Children of gay couple pride parade. Digital image. Reuters. N.p., n.d. Web. 12 Mar. 2015. <×320.jpg>.




Be sure to understand what is being said. We are not taking into account divorce/separation rates. Unfortunately family stability for both same-sex and traditional marriage is rare, but that is another argument entirely. Here we are comparing two very specific groups, both of which involve two parents that have been present for much of the child’s rearing years. One group involving same-sex parents and the other consisting of a male father and a female mother. The evidence presented does not suggest that gay parents are incapable of loving their children and it does not mean that marriages between a man and a women always provide a loving, positive environment for children. It means that children of same-sex parents suffer greater odds of emotional struggle in general when compared to children raised in traditional households.


In the words of Katy Faust, a daughter of same-sex parents and an opponent to same sex marriage, “Now we are normalizing a family structure where a child will always be deprived daily of one gender influence and the relationship with at least one natural parent. Our cultural narrative becomes one that, in essence, tells children that they have no right to the natural family structure or their biological parents, but that children simply exist for the satisfaction of adult desires. . . The label of bigot or hater has become very powerful and effective tools to silence those of us who choose not to endorse the marriage platform of many gay lobbyists,” Faust continued. “For much of my adult life I was content to keep my opinions on the subject of marriage to myself. I was (and still am) sickened by the accusation that I was bigoted and anti-gay for my belief in natural marriage. For many years those devices kept me quiet. I didn’t seek a venue where I could share my views. But I have come to realize that my silence, and the silence of others, has allowed for the conversation to be dominated by those who claim that only animus, ignorance, or indoctrination could lead one to oppose ‘marriage equality.’”


Let us cease to be silent.


Some say that same-sex couples have the right to adopt children. They say it is better for a child to have two loving same-sex parents than it is for the child to have one or none. While it is true that same-sex couples have the capacity to love and care for children the most trustworthy research shows that children are generally better off with their biological parents. We live in an imperfect world. Unfortunately it is impossible for us to guarantee a perfect environment for every child. But shouldn’t that be our goal? Isn’t it our responsibility to arrange our laws so that in general children will be protected? If there is any unalienable right that every child deserves, it is the right to grow up in the care of a loving mother and father.



Source: Parents helping baby walk. Digital image. SheKnows. N.p., n.d. Web. 11 Mar. 2015. <>.





Andersen, Kirsten. “‘Quartet of Truth’: Adult Children of Gay Parents Testify against Same-sex ‘marriage’ at 5th Circuit.” Life Site. 13 Jan. 2015. Web.


Gartrell, Nanette, and Henny Bos. “US National Longitudinal Lesbian Family Study: Psychological Adjustment of 17-Year-Old Adolescents.” Pediatrics. The American Academy of Pediatrics, 23 Mar. 2010. Web.


Regnerus, Mark. “Parental Same-sex Relationships, Family Instability, and Subsequent Life Outcomes for Adult Children: Answering Critics of the New Family Structures Study with Additional Analyses.” ScienceDirect. Elsevier, 15 Nov. 2012. Web.


Sprigg, Peter. “New Study On Homosexual Parents Tops All Previous Research.” Family Research Council. Web. 7 Mar. 2015.


Sullins, Donald Paul. “Emotional Problems among Children with Same-Sex Parents: Difference by Definition.” Social Science Research Network. British Journal of Education, 25 Jan. 2015. Web.


“US Support for Gay Marriage at Highest Ever.” 10 Mar. 2015. Web. <>.




Great kid friendly websites

Mom Moments

Try these great kid friendly websites to help beat the summer time boredom that seems to find its way into our homes as the heat zaps our kids which ends up zapping us! Whew!  That was a mouthful.

Great kid friendly websites


                               Websites for kids

The Internet Schoolhouse

Windows to the Universe

States Online

Ancient Sites


Early America


E-Greeting Cards

The Puzzle Depot

Ultimate Origami

Animal Adventures

Disney Online

Great kid friendly websites

Short Story – Conclusion

A goof off picture of Ron and I.

Well, here is the amateur’s short story conclusion…

Short Story – Conclusion

Choice (continued)

by Julie Valentine

The guy down there was a jerk, no one would miss him. Images of the tour groups accusing faces assaulted him. Would they believe this was an accident? Groping around, he found his handkerchief and mopped his face.

Rand leaned over the guardrail again in an attempt to spot Clifford. There was still no sign of him. “Hey, you ok down there?” he croaked.  Clifford was probably fine. Brooke would be grateful he found her license. His skin pricked at the possibility of Clifford being hurt, but his hesitation was short lived. He would let Clifford find his own way back to the group.  He turned, loping up the trail through more mud, black, and oozing under his feet. A limb smacked him in the face as he hurried along, leaving a red welt under his right eye. Adrenaline pumped him on.

Turmoil roiled within Rand, thoughts swam around in his head as he tried to decide if the guilt inside was worth the affections of anyone? He hadn’t meant to hurt the jerk. Maybe he was fine down there. Reaching the group, he glanced at Brooke as he approached, measuring her reaction to the found license. The close proximity to her sent a wave of pleasure over him, faint drifts of fragrance wafting from her body reaching his senses. Brooke seemed so happy to get that license back. It was enough to help him temporarily forget the past few minutes. “Mind if I walk with you gals?” Rand ventured.

Brooke felt so relieved that Rand had found her license. The headache she would surely avoid was a huge help as she looked over at Rand. That really was a sweet thing he did for her. She considered him for a minute thinking, “I really ought to be nice to him for running back for me.” She smiled and thanked Rand. A grin erupted on his face causing Brooke to hesitate in her praise of him. She began to question Rand about himself in an attempt to be friendly when the tour guide’s radio interrupted the jungle sounds.

Not paying much attention to their guide’s crackling radio, Brooke asked Rand what was taking her brother so long to get back to the group. Heat rose to his face as he turned to her and sputtered, “Your brother?!”

“Yeah, my brother that ran after you for the license. He bugs me so much sometimes with how protective he is, but it’s nice to have someone look after me too.”

Rand stumbled backwards, his breath coming in short bursts like the panting of a dog. Brooke instinctively tried to grab him. Both of them looked over at the guide who was trying to get everyone’s attention by waving them over to him. He motioned for the group to congregate and after doing so announced that the tour had been suspended because the authorities received a distress call from the phone of a hiker that had fallen. Help had not arrived in time. The body found would need to be recovered and carried out. Chaos erupted in the group as the tour guide tried to gain control.

Rand’s world came crashing down around him. The acrid taste of bile rose in his throat as the events of the past few minutes crashed about his head. He took a fleeting glance at Brooke’s face and saw disdain and suspicion. She stood behind Sierra slightly trembling, and clinging to her arm. His own face reflected the responsibility of a mind riddled with the remorse of the guilty.  Despair folded its way through him; he’d made the wrong choice.

The End

Garlic,The Stinking Rose

Garlic, The Stinking Rose


image by

My husband walks through the door and complains, “Awk, what’s that smell?!” The children on the other hand exclaim, “I LOVE that smell! What’s for dinner?” Yep, garlic. Whether you like the smell or not, the health benefits are there. Mayo Clinic states:  ”Garlic also is well known for its potential benefits to heart health, especially lowering high levels of lipids in the blood. And, some evidence indicates that garlic may relax smooth muscles and dilate blood vessels. Studies have shown that taking a garlic extract (200 to 400 milligrams three times daily for one month) can lower blood pressure modestly. This research is preliminary and is not enough to support taking garlic solely to lower blood pressure.” Garlic is known for it’s anti-bacterial, anti-viral, anti-fungal, and powerful anti-oxidant properties.  Study results are found on

Grow it with ease

I have discovered that garlic is a snap to grow. Plus, the flavor is much richer and robust than store bought garlic. The cloves are almost juicy. Here’s how to grow it:

Plant individual cloves in the fall about two inches deep. In the spring they will sprout up early. I dig up garlic near the end of July and store them in a cool dry place.

One great thing about growing your own, is the crop multiplies quickly year to year because you plant the individual cloves. In other words, you get many plants from one garlic.


Grin and Bare It


Grin and Bare it

I’m sure you’ve heard the old saying, “Grin and Bare it.” There are benefits galore from smiling and laughing.  Studies have found that a smile that reaches the eyes as opposed to a forced smile, relieves stress more effectively.

Smiles are generally divided into two categories: standard smiles, which use the muscles surrounding the mouth, and genuine, (or Duchenne smiles), which engage the muscles surrounding both the mouth and eyes.

Previous research shows that positive emotions can help during times of stress and that smiling can affect emotion; however, this is first of its kind to experimentally manipulate the types of smiles people make in order to examine the effects of smiling on stress.“..Huffpost Lifestyle (click above link)

Have you noticed a laughing fit gives you a wonderful sense of wellbeing? Laughing releases dopamine, which produces feelings of happiness. So LAUGH, LAUGH, LAUGH!

Related posts:

Take a Deep Breath

Take a Deep Breath
Take a Deep Breath

Image by Janielle Beh

I have discovered a powerful means of achieving a high sense of wellbeing. Would you believe that it comes through breath? I first started to experience this when I began doing Yoga. Yoga consists of a breathing technique.


Take a deep breath! the following is a quote from this webpage:

“From the Belly

Before learning the rhythmic patterns that will take your running to a new level, you must first become a belly breather, that is, learn to breathe from your diaphragm. When you inhale, your diaphragm contracts and moves downward, while muscles in your chest contract to expand your rib cage, which increases the volume in your chest cavity and draws air into your lungs. Working your diaphragm to its fullest potential allows your lungs to expand to their greatest volume and fill with the largest amount of air, which of course you need for your running. The more air you inhale, the more oxygen is available to be transferred through your circulatory system to your working muscles. Many people underuse their diaphragm, relying too much on their chest muscles and therefore taking in less oxygen, which is so important to energy production. The other downside of breathing from your chest is that these muscles (the intercostals) are smaller and will fatigue more quickly than your diaphragm will. To rely less on your chest muscles to breathe, you’ll want to train yourself to breathe from your belly, that is, with your diaphragm. Practice belly breathing both lying down and sitting or standing, since you should be breathing diaphragmatically at all times—whether you’re running, sleeping, eating, or reading a book. Here’s how to learn the technique:

• Lie down on your back.

• Keep your upper chest and shoulders still.

• Focus on raising your belly as you inhale.

• Lower your belly as you exhale.

• Inhale and exhale through both your nose and mouth.”



There is so much more I want to say on this subject but will save it for  a later post.

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